This post is more personal (the blog is full of them these days huh). People who have been following me online will know. April is a crazy month and I’ve been quite unstable, stressed and yeah it’s like a rollercoaster ride of emotions. Not so evident from the blog, but yeah still visible. Some of my friends have been asking if I’m alright hahaha. Yes I am (for the most part) but a lot of things have been going on – I have to deal with a lot of stuff that I hate to do (sorry it still has to remain cryptic).
Enough of that.
Like most people, I want to rant a little online but increasingly, I find myself unable to do that. Now that the blog has quite a sizable readership (?), I find myself being even more careful of what I reveal and how I behave online. It’s not like I’m trying to create a fake persona on the blog, but there’s a lot more repercussions I think. I’ve been meeting people who reads the blog even in the most unlikely situations (eg. job interviewers who were already readers of my blog o.O) and I seriously wonder who’s out there reading the blog hahaha. Hangukdrama (and related activities) is now very much a part of me that it’s getting difficult to draw a line between my so-called professional (non-existent yet) and personal life.
Although Korean is still a hobby for me, I’ve actively (and also indirectly) made Korean to be a big part of my life (and will get bigger I guess?) that I can’t just talk without thinking anymore. For example, it totally won’t look good for a erm say fashion designer to have random outbursts of how much he/she hates fashion and the recent crappy trends (even if it’s really just a one-off comment that the person didn’t really meant) or start complaining about fashion companies / institutes that he/she may be in in the future. Yeah, so I can’t shoot my mouth off for Korean too hahaha.
Frustrated with a lot of stuff but I can’t just air them in the blog / twitter.
If I already feel this way (being just an insignificant blogger on the internet), how do famous people deal with it?! hahahaha just a passing thought.
I’ll just have to keep my frustrations, snide remarks and complaints to myself haha. xD
Prepping for my first academic conference and I’m super excited. I take pride in my thesis and I think doing a paper presentation will be damn fun!!